Bottom-Line Up-Front:

Words are what we have to inspire, motivate, clarify, empower, and enable. Yet, too often, our words work against us and create problems. Start thinking about words as building blocks of great conversations. They’re like Legos, and you can assembe them in a nearly infinite number of ways. Some of those ways help people grow, create clarity and alignment or redouble your display of respect for others. Constructed properly, words solve more problems than they make. If you’re drowning in drama and problems, it’s time to rethink how you assemble your building blocks. 

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Peel the Onion and There’s a Communication Problem Near the Center

Every workplace and career problem has a communication issue close to the core. Just a few I’ve encountered recently:

  • A Strategy misfire
  • An execution muck-up
  • A failure to launch
  • Disengagement
  • Never-ending project delays
  • Way too much attrition
  • Creeping toxicity
  • An innovation flops
  • A Gordian Knot of process problems
  • Creeping quality issues

Somewhere near the root cause of all of these problems, there was one or more communication misfires. 

When the Building Blocks Weren’t Assembled Properly

“Our strategy is like a cheeseburger” was a communication disaster. His intentions were good. The group didn’t need that level of abstract simplicity. 

My ill-advised, ill-fated re-introduction of two members of my team who had, in my opinion, not been talking together enough was just dumb. Ouch. I still feel the sting of their responses.

That feedback discussion where he walked out of the building, never to return. The manager would like a do-over, please. 

The management team that was afraid to speak truth to power and backed the CEO’s pet strategy. The firm is now gone. 

The lack of feedback allowed a toxic individual to tromp all over everyone until they rebelled. 

While not privy to their internal conversations, I’ll wager heavily that the road to Boeing’s newsworthy misfires is strewn with communication challenges.

The manager who was too busy to engage in one-on-ones with their team members wonders why creativity is low, attrition is high, and no one seems motivated to step up to new challenges. 

The leader who doled out public criticism with all the care and subtlety of a gravel crusher wonders why people keep leaving. 

It’s easy to misuse our words.  

We All Have the Same Building Blocks. Some People Are Just Better Builders

Phil M. Jones, the author of the little book with the big ideas, “Exactly What to Say,” says it best. “Throughout my studies of people, human relationships and business interactions, I have been amazed by how some people achieve dramatically different results than others with what seem to be the exact same ingredients.” 

Those ‘ingredients’ are words. And words are like Legos. 

Each of us has the opportunity to assemble them in ways that show respect, help people learn, inspire those around us, and, importantly, engage people and draw out their superpowers and creativity. 

Most of my executive coaching calls involve dealing with challenging people in difficult situations. I nudge the individual to carefully assess their building blocks and assemble them to achieve a good outcome. They’re amazed, yet there’s nothing amazing happening here. It’s just careful consideration of how to bring the right words in the right tone with the right body language to the situation.

Your Opportunity

Starting today, slow down. Think about the building blocks you need to assemble to help someone. Make sure the construction shows respect. And then start building. 

Art's Signature

 

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In the New(er) Manager Development, Senior Manager and Feedback Skills programs, I help participants design their communications for maximum impact. E-mail Art to discuss a program for your team.