A Cup of Leadership Caffeine“How can I help?”  These four simple words are powerful leadership tools when framed into a question and applied with genuine intent.

The leader that is comfortable asking this question is comfortable in his or her leadership skin.  It takes self-confidence, a dose of humility and a genuine comprehension of the role of leader to form and apply the question, “How can I help?”

This individual understands that “telling” isn’t the only way to lead.

The act of asking the question shows that the leader has confidence in his team members.  This is a subtle but important way for the leader to say, “I trust you” to individuals and teams.

The Intent of “How Can I Help?”

The engineering manager asking this question isn’t expecting to be invited to lead the next design review or to write a few lines of code.  She wants to know if she can provide support by providing resources, helping to shape policy, brokering alliances and repairing systemic problems.  She’s really asking,

  • Are there obstacles in your way that I can clear out for you?
  • Do you have the tools and resources that you need to do the work?
  • Is there something wrong with our business processes that we can improve?
  • Is there something that I can do that will increase the likelihood that teams and individuals will succeed?

Don’t confuse the use of “How can I help,” with the need to pitch in on the loading dock so that customers receive their orders, or, the need to sit in on a team meeting where the group has been unable to work well together.  These types of transactional or fire fighting situations provide context for the leader to understand where help is truly required.  The individual acts are just part of the bigger picture problem-solving process.

The Bottom-Line for Now:

Don’t discount how much self-confidence it takes for a leader to ask the question, “How can I help?”  Much of modern leadership culture is predicated on the false belief that those at higher levels are paid to tell people how and what to do.  Just like “telling ain’t teaching,” it’s usually not leading either.