Leadership Caffeine: The Word Selection of Journeyman Leaders
Filed under: "To Do" List, Career, Leadership, Leadership Caffeine, Performance, Professional Growth
If you’ve ever had the good fortune to watch a skilled carpenter or mechanic or any proficient trade-person, one of the first things that you will notice is the care that they take in selecting the right tool for the task at hand.
As someone who practices the trades around my homes (it’s a genetic predisposition), I’ve not yet earned the designation of skilled or proficient, but I certainly have learned the power of just the right tool. There are many choices for most tasks, but only one tool that will allow you to complete the task without potentially causing additional damage. A vice-grip is no substitute for the proper wrench and the wrong screwdriver will practically guarantee a slip and a strip. Sadly, every time I’ve taken a shortcut and used the wrong tool for a job, I’ve created more damage in the process.
Words are the leader’s tools in trade, and the same lessons on care in selection and use apply.
For too many leaders, word selection is a hurried and blind groping in the toolbox for something that will do the job. In the absence of careful selection, a quick barking of orders, an unfiltered criticism or an out of context pronouncement will all create collateral damage.
As a high-school student in Shop Class (do they still teach Shop?), we spent what seemed like an inordinate amount of time learning the use and care of all of the tools, before we were allowed to start on our own projects. While a bit laborious at the time, in hindsight, I realize that this approach taught us to think about the task at hand and to carefully think about and select just the right tool to ensure quality and simplicity.
Perhaps we need the equivalent of a Shop class for leaders.
8 Ideas to Help You Choose Your Leader’s Words Like a Skilled Craftsman:
1. Choose words that clarify. One of your core tasks is to provide context. People do their best work when they understand its import and its connection to the bigger picture.
2. Choose words that convey respect? Even in the heat of battle, your words, your tone and your demeanor must communicate respect. The art of delivering an order with respect is the hard-earned sign of a journeyman.
3. Choose and use your words efficiently? Many leaders mistakenly assume that their roles are licenses to talk. After awhile, all we hear is the drone of blah, blah, blah.
4, Ensure that your words help you connect with others. Learning the art of how to relate to others enables conveys respect and enables improved coaching and mentoring.
5. Use words that teach. Learning the fine art of coaching and mentoring is like learning how to use a set of advanced woodworking tools. Once mastered, you are able to craft and form remarkable finished works from simple blocks.
6. Use words that encourage group learning and that help you learn. The right words phrased as questions challenge individuals to think through situations and encourage everyone to learn.
7. Use words that convey accountability and fairness. You cannot craft an effective working environment with both of these important concepts being visible to all.
8. Use words that inspire and challenge. While the task at hand might be about moving a pile of rocks, the goal may be to build a great cathedral.
The Bottom-Line for Now:
Beginning today, start treating your words as the tools of your trade. Think carefully about their selection and application, and choose words that build. Anyone can hack through a day, but only the skilled leader understands his/her power to craft and create every time she opens her mouth. Treat your words with respect and they will serve you well.
Leadership Caffeine-Does Your Do Match Your Tell?
Filed under: "To Do" List, Career, Leadership, Leadership Caffeine
Fresh on the heels of my remarkably fun and productive collaboration with Mary Jo Asmus of Intentional Leadership on “The Words of a Leader,” I feel duty bound to remind you that while words are indeed powerful tools for creation or destruction, it’s your actions that will seal your fate as a leader. Or rather, how well your actions and your words match.
Only the Paranoid Survive to Lead Effectively:
With apologies to Andy Grove for truly misappropriating and slightly twisting the title of his great book (Only the Paranoid Survive), in this case, it’s true.
Everyone IS watching you and they are all passing judgment on your credibility as a leader. Constantly. Constantly that is, until they find you guilty of failing the test of credibility and they shift into compliance mode. You’re finished as a leader at this point.
More Practical Lessons in Leadership:
When Rich Petro and I were talking with leaders of all types and levels for Practical Lessons in Leadership, we truly wanted to understand what contributed to a person being perceived as a “credible” leader—someone that people trusted and put faith in to follow.
The answers from our interview subjects came fast and were surprisingly consistent. They had little to do with how articulate the leader was or how well he or she could paint a picture of a glorious new future.
Rather, the answers consistently focused on whether the words of the leader were backed by actions that supported those words. Any dissonance between the words and the actions was clearly identified by our interview subjects as credibility killers.
I loved the way one mid-level manager put it: “The do must match the tell.”
Simply and powerfully stated.
Opportunities to Watch Out for Your Do and Tell:
It might shock you to realize how many times per day you face little moments of truth where your “Do and Tell” are being judged. Here are some all too common examples of self destruction by the leader’s own dissonant behaviors:
- Issues of Accountability: it’s hard to be credible after preaching accountability but failing to deal with performance issues and poor performers. Your “Do” is showing and lacking here.
- The Jordan Rules: Star players contribute to championship teams, but if you’ve got two sets of rules…one for the star(s) and one for everyone else, your credibility is in trouble.
- The Closed Open Door: Enough with that “I’ve got an open door policy,” as you remain huddled behind a slab of oak that only opens to toss out a body after you shoot the messenger who stepped through the door on a rare occasion when it was open.
- The “Work harder so I can relax more” pitch: I love the characters that show up to harangue or implore the troops to push harder and then head out for long lunches or another in a nearly endless string of exotic vacations.
- The “Take Risks, Be Bold and Learn from Mistakes,” preacher: “Just not on my watch,” say their actions…as yet another formerly bold body gets tossed out of the rarely open door.
- The “That’s an important topic and we should talk about it at the right time,” manager: It’s never the right time.
The Bottom Line:
Watch out for the “Do and Tell” traps that snare so many leaders. Even the small situations…the exceptions and the odd circumstances will be viewed through the lens of credibility and judged accordingly. You don’t want to be caught with your “Do clashing with your Tell.”
Two Voices on: The Words of a Leader
Filed under: "To Do" List, Career, Leadership, Leading Change, Professional Growth, Values
A note from Art: This dual post was the outcome of a casual exchange of thoughts via Twitter that quickly evolved into a must-write piece and fun collaboration. My partner in crime here is Mary Jo Asmus, the author of the outstanding Intentional Leadership blog...one that I turn to regularly for inspiration and insight. What great fortune it is to have met someone as passionate and thoughtful and pragmatic about the topic of leadership and relationships as Mary Jo. Another wonderful example of the power of social networking!
A note from Mary Jo: Art Petty and I met through the social networking realm recently and found that we were kindred souls, of sorts. Through a Twitter conversation, and subsequent telephone discussion about the importance of the words a leader speaks, we came to this place of deciding to collaborate on a post about the topic. Through the lens of differing, but complimentary aspects of a leader’s words, we found that the collaboration worked to produce the following post that we not only had some fun putting together, but helped us to learn a thing or two from each other – and hope you will too.
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We decided to run both of our essays at both sites…in part because these posts live on long after their initial publication. Feel free to read and comment at either site, and we’ll watch and offer our respective comments in both locations. Enjoy!
The Words of a Leader-Mary Jo Asmus
“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.” – Buddha
“Thoughts become words. Words become actions. Actions become character. Character is everything.” – Unknown
“Think before you speak.” Mom
The Buddha, Unknown, and Mom were all very smart. They knew that all words arise from thoughts, and the words we speak are words that are capable of the power to build, inspire, create or destroy.
Before a leader’s words actually get formed within the mouth, there is the place of thought. The thought that creates the words might be but a nanosecond. This little bit of time can’t prevent a leader from saying something that was unintended or taken out of context. And because followers tend to be “hyper vigilant” about their leaders – anything you say has a greater impact than you may be willing to believe.
So this is the connection that a leader needs to be aware of. Thoughts become words that become action. In order for us to say the right things in order to take the right actions, we may need to begin with our thoughts.
Change your thoughts, change your words.
In our speed-of-light world, we must slow down in order to become aware of our thoughts, in order to speak and take action in a way that is congruent with our values. You can bet that Tiger Woods and other successful athletes imagine and rehearse successful outcomes before following through on them. Why wouldn’t this apply to you and the words you use as a leader? What successful outcomes do you want your words to speak of?
Imagine using words that will build, inspire and create. What are they? Imagine your words being accepted and used in the way you intend them to be. Consider the values you hold most dear. What are your values, and how will your words describe them? How will they be incorporated into the language you use every day?
Take a mental break from the anxiety, worry and judging that go on in your thoughts. Consider a reflective practice or a meditative practice that will allow you to do so. Just as an athlete must rest his muscles, it also makes sense for us to rest our minds and thoughts. Such a practice has the effect of slowing you down, allowing you to renew yourself at the level of thought. Notice your thoughts as they arise in your practice, and you have begun a process of observing that will start you on a path to improving the words you speak as you go about your everyday life. A reflective or meditative practice has arms that reach far beyond the minimal time you spend doing them.
Where your thoughts don’t serve you, change them. Negative self-talk around guilt, anger, or hatred will not serve to help you say the words that your followers need to hear. When those thoughts arise, ask yourself if they are serving to help you in your leadership. If they aren’t, what would you prefer to change them to?
Your thoughts come through in your words, even if you don’t realize it. Others do. Become aware of your thoughts and your words can be intentional, purposeful and life-giving. You will then find it easier to accept the wise suggestions of my colleague, Art, below.
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The Words of a Leader-Art Petty
I’ve often marveled at the speed that an off-handed comment from the boss can fly through an organization, quickly evolving into policy or direction. “Mary said…,” or, “I just heard that… .”
Have you had the unfortunate experience of seeing or hearing a manager publicly chastise a subordinate? This abuser seems to take strength from the assertion of power while the receiver visibly shrinks in stature. Observers feel pity for one and anger at the other.
Have you had the good fortune to work for someone that seemed to draw the best out of you through constructive coaching and encouragement? This type of an impact can last a lifetime.
Have you wondered what it is about that manager that everyone wants to work for? The comments usually go something like this: “She’s demanding and holds us accountable, but we’re accomplishing things and having fun in the process.”
A License To Talk:
While the communication process comprises much more than just the words that we string together, the words truly serve to build-up people, teams and organizations. Words inspire, motivate, challenge, teach and encourage.
Or, they serve as the blunt force weapons of personal and professional trauma and destruction.
Good leaders are builders and they form and shape their words into phrases and questions that encourage learning and improvement and risk-taking and more learning. Good leaders are master craftsmen in many ways, and words are some of their most important tools.
Less effective leaders use words like tools as well, but in this case they crassly apply the words of brute force in settings where precision is called for. They use the end of a wrench to pound in a nail, and seem to disregard the damage to the surrounding area. Of course, they should have used a finishing hammer and a nail set.
Other leaders use words to shape agendas. Good politicians broker understanding and alliances through their words. Less well-intentioned leaders use words to sew the seeds of doubt and mistrust and to shape alliances that benefit one person or one team.
Words are powerful tools. Perhaps leaders should be trained and certified on their use. Hmmm., perhaps leaders should be trained in general, much as a master craftsperson would train an apprentice.
Sticks and Stones:
I doubt that many of us have spent a lot of time considering our approach to word-choice much since our playground days, where the use of words as weapons by some is first mastered. The defense of, “Sticks and stones will break my bones but names will never hurt me,” was never really a good defense, was it?
While many of us intuitively understand how powerful our words are, in my own experience, we do a less than effective job teaching this to our apprentice leaders. Consider how many “coaching opportunities” are created as we deal with teams and individuals that push back based on the “approach” used by these early leaders. Peel away the issues and at the bottom, you’ll almost always find an issue with words.
There’s no manual for this topic, but perhaps a few well-intended “words” will help. Consider sharing this with your apprentice leaders and perhaps you’ll avoid the “he said/she said” coaching calls in favor of something more constructive.
Words of Advice for The Words of a Leader
- Listen more than you talk. Use your words sparingly. Leading doesn’t mean that you are required to talk more than anyone else. Quite the opposite.
- Think before you talk. Choose your words deliberately.
- A well-turned question is often more effective to get people thinking than a dozen statements. Manage your questions to comments ratio.
- All of your words must include respect as a foundation. As soon as respect is left out of your words, you’ve lost.
- Make certain that your words and your body language match. Given a choice between the two, studies indicate that people believe the body language over the words.
- Tough conversations on performance are part of your job. Embrace this reality and don’t sugarcoat your words. Do keep them focused on behaviors and keep the behaviors linked to business.
- Genuine words of encouragement and well-deserved words of praise are rocket fuel for individuals and teams.
- “The do must match the tell.” The words of leaders not backed by actions and support are just so much hot air.
- Be aware that your words as a leader will be amplified and distorted. Manage your words carefully.
The Bottom-Line on The Words of a Leader:
The choice is yours to lead like a master craftsman or a common hack. Choose and use your words carefully and you’ll be amazed at what those around you create.
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