A Leadership Christmas Carol-Bah Humbug to These Leaders
Given the state of things in our world, perhaps for just one season, Dickens’ ghosts can shift their attention away from Scrooge and focus on a few of those truly deserving characters hiding in positions of leadership inside our organizations and governmental institutions.
May these questionable characters (the alleged leaders, not the ghosts) gain a deeper understanding of the pain and suffering they’ve needlessly created during their time in the leadership realm. For those who see the error of their ways, perhaps it’s not too late.
For those who do not, well, we all know the story. May the weight from their chains grow heavier and increasingly burdensome as they forge their links one lousy leadership event at a time.
Scheduled for the Holiday Haunting List:
-Micro-Managers who consistently smother the spark of creativity everywhere they go.
-The My-Way or the Highway Leaders who never met an idea of their own they didn’t fall in love with and then ram down people’s throats.
-The Monologue Leaders who prattle on endlessly with orders and commands and just don’t give a damn about anyone else’s opinion.
-Color Challenged Leaders-I: leaders who see gray in the face of black and white ethical issues.
-Color and Difference Challenged Leaders-II: those who make decisions about people for any reason other than focusing on qualifications and capabilities. Leadership must be color and difference blind.
-Leaders who squander public trust in pursuit of their own selfish goals. Oddly, many of these characters end up as governors in my home state of Illinois.
-Forgetful Leaders...particularly those who misplace a billion dollars give or take a few hundred million. (That’s you, John Corzine.)
-Elected Leaders who betray our trust by not solving problems..all in the name of ideology. Congress, anyone?
-The “I’s” Have it Leaders: those who use the personal pronoun “I” excessively. In particular, a certain President.
-Dump-Truck Leaders-anyone who backs up the feedback dump truck once a year and unloads everything on his people in one big load.
-The I Can Fix You Leaders-everyone who focuses on fixing us, not on promoting our development.
The Bottom-Line for Now:
The list is growing long and the Ghosts of Leadership Past, Present and Future only have so much time to work their magic. May their efforts bear fruit as we look to the new year and a long list of problems in need of the best our society and our firms have to offer.
And yes, for those that don’t get it…Bah Humbug.
–
Want More? Check out Art Petty’s latest book, Leadership Caffeine-Ideas to Energize Your Professional Development. Created for fast-moving and highly motivated professionals and leaders, Leadership Caffeine offers more than 80 short, idea-packed essays for the critical leadership and professional development situations in your life. Ideal for leadership discussion groups. A great holiday gift for the professionals in your life!
- Single and Kindle copies on Amazon.
- Group and Volume orders, visit Marathon Books for the best service.
About Art Petty:
Art Petty is a Leadership & Career Coach and Strategy Consultant, helping motivated professionals of all levels achieve their potential. In addition to working with highly motivated professionals, Art frequently works with project teams in pursuit of high performance. Contact Art via e-mail to discuss a coaching, workshop or speaking engagement or to inquire about being a guest on The Leadership Caffeine podcast.
Two Voices on Being Heard and Not Being Heard
Note from Art: Mary Jo Asmus and I are back with our third collaborative blogging effort. Our first posts, “Two Voices on the Words of a Leader” and “Two Voices on Humility and the Effective Leader,” remain personal and reader favorites. I like the “Words” post so much…particularly Mary Jo’s portion, that with her permission, I’m including it in my forthcoming book, Leadership Caffeine-Ideas to Energize Your Professional Development.
I’ve rarely enjoyed collaborating with someone more, and there’s no doubt I benefit from Mary Jo’s inspiration and from her outstanding prose ending up on the same page as mine. For those who have not experienced our prior efforts, we’re kind of a point-counter-point, except instead of disagreeing, we end up at the same destination, just via a different route. And of course, Mary Jo is the shining star in this fun blogging endeavor! Enjoy.
What it Means to Feel Heard
by Mary Jo Asmus writing at Aspire-CS
I was in the second month of the fifth grade and my small comfortable world would soon be rocked. My family lived in an old-fashioned neighborhood with trees lining the street in a small town. We had neighbors on all sides of us us that I knew well. Patty, my best friend, lived half a block away. I walked to a school four short blocks away, and had memorized every home and its inhabitants (including the dogs and cats) along the way. I loved Mrs. Gilroy, my teacher.
Mom and Dad decided we were going to move outside of the town, where the neighbors lived far apart and the trees grew thick. Shortly after the new year I’d start at a new school, where I’d still have to walk, but without the reassurance of sidewalks to guide me and neighbors I knew well. I’d have a new teacher and would make new friends. I was scared.
Mom must have called Mrs. Gilroy to tell her the news because she approached me on the playground to ask how I was doing. She stood quietly facing me, listening to me speak of my fear. I know she heard me because she was quiet and intent. She didn’t minimize my fears or tell me that everything would be okay. She asked me questions that helped her – and me – to comprehend what I was feeling. Her amazing ability to make me feel heard about the changes I would be experiencing continued into the ensuing weeks before our move.
Like many of you, I can count the times that I’ve really felt heard on two hands. Mrs. Gilroy’s focused listening was one of the first in my life – and an event that seems quite small on the surface. But her ability to make me feel heard was so exceptional and extraordinary that I remember the details of the actual conversation (which I won’t bore you with) many decades later. I felt understood, accepted (by someone “in power”) and more confident about the upcoming move.
Can you recall a time that you really felt heard? What did you experience and feel? I’m betting these are some of the things you’d say:
Respected: When you truly felt heard, you believed that your opinions and thoughts were respected. This inspired a sense of loyalty to the person who was listening to you.
Open: When you were deeply listened to, you were open to saying what was on your mind. You might also have felt more open to the differing opinions of the listener. This openness is the seed of creativity and courage.
Understood: When you were heard, you felt a sense of relief at being understood. Understanding deepens the relationships with others. Relationships strengthen and support leadership.
Connected: When you felt listened to, you sensed a connection to the person you were in dialog with. I don’t even know if Mrs. Gilroy is still alive, but I remember her and feel a sense of connection to her to this day.
Your followers need to feel heard by you in order to belong. When they belong, they become motivated and engaged. If there is a legacy you could leave that would make an impact on your organization it is as a leader who made people feel heard. They’ll remember you.
Everyone seems to be trying to figure out how to engage employees. Is it possible that the simple yet profound act of making someone feel heard is the key to engagement?
–
What it Means Not to Feel Heard
by Art Petty
I learned long ago that many of the best ideas and the best team members are individuals whose voices have been silenced by a less than ideal leader.
Through a quirk of career fate, I ended up serving several times in turnaround roles, following people who it appears are much better suited to something other than running businesses and leading teams.
In seeking to get to know my new associates and gain insights into issues and opportunities, I would sit with people and listen as they described their ideas on improving our business. On more than a few occasions, the discussions would spill over into personal-professional frustrations, and it was fairly common for me to walk away after the meeting, silently fuming at the misguided leadership practices that kept well-meaning people from being heard.
I learned from listening that these victims of leader abuse tend to work quietly in the background, careful not to draw attention and quietly wishing there was something more they could contribute. Some have given up. Others keep a small fire burning as they hope for change.
These “Ghosts in the Machine” represent voices unheard, talent untapped and energy unharnessed.
Consider:
“That’s an important topic and we should talk about it at the right time.”
It was never the right time.
“It’s about time someone listened to us.”
“Are you going to be just like the last guy?”
or through tears,
“No one ever took the time to ask my opinion before.”
C’mon Leaders!
We all get how tough it is to compete, sustain and succeed in this world. It’s unlikely to get much easier, and you need every neuron firing in all of the grey matter you can possibly muster on your team and in your organization. Practicing leadership in a way that fosters fear and silences good people is no way to succeed.
It’s appropriate for all of us to remember that those who labor quietly and competently behind the front lines and those who quietly and expertly execute their tasks from the front understand how work gets done. They also understand what customers are thinking, where the organizational bodies are buried, and what might make things better. And of course, they want to do great things for their careers, their customers and their firms. However, they need an opportunity to be heard.
Give me a team of people who have been waiting for their opportunity to be heard, point us at a target and watch out!
Tap into the heart and mind of someone waiting for the opportunity to contribute, and you’ve gained an ally for life.
The Bottom-Line for Now:
It’s demeaning, demoralizing and angering to be ignored. Lousy leaders operate oblivious to this costly stress they create as they plow through their self-centered days. Good leaders recognize this is wrong and great leaders liberate the souls laboring in the background…not as conquering emperors but as servants seeking the best for their people and their firms.
Help someone be heard today and you might just be changing the fate of your organization for the better. You’ll most definitely be helping change someone’s career for the better.
At Least 3 Reasons We’re Still Raving About Lousy Leaders
Filed under: Leadership, Management Innovation, Performance, Surviving Lousy Leaders, Values
Note from Art: As I approach my 500th post here at Management Excellence in the next few weeks (that’s in the neighborhood of half-a-million words on management and leadership) my writing mood is shifting to one of, “let’s get this leadership thing right people.” The blueprint for effective leadership is not carefully guarded like the secret formula to Coca Cola. It’s on display for all of us to see and to apply. Why then are there so many exceptions? Read on for my wildly speculative and hopefully provocative thoughts.
Spend any amount of time reading or engaging with the many remarkable individuals that write, speak, teach and coach leaders, and you’re to be excused if you quickly conclude that we’re all in violent agreement with each other.
The principles behind what a reasonable person would agree represents effective leadership are practically universal truths that support an unarguable argument.
I’ll wager a month’s worth of coffee that if you asked everyone that you know to generate a list on what makes an effective leader, the output would be nearly identical. While preferences in styles might vary, (and there would certainly be differences across cultures,) core attributes and behaviors generally remain constant. The only differences will likely be due to memory lapses such as, “Oh, I forgot that one, but you’re right,” versus true differences of opinion.
So if this construct of an effective leader is so readily apparent, why is there a nearly endless supply of disgruntled workers capable of describing lousy leader horror stories to anyone that will listen? Importantly, why doesn’t this intuitive and common understanding of what an effective leader acts like manifest itself with more frequency in our workplaces?
3 Reasons Why We’re Still Raving About Lousy Leaders:
1. As humans and workers, perhaps we’re happy being miserable. While I would be saddened to adopt this viewpoint, it’s easy to see that “the boss” gives us something to work for and rail against and his/her actions and utterances serve as a source of bonding with peers.
Is it possible that we could work for someone with the presence of Washington or the authenticity of Lincoln or Gandhi and be unhappy? You bet! OK, that’s a bit sad, but there’s at least a kernel of truth in there somewhere.
Possible conclusion: we need to accept our own propensity to enjoy our misery. While it’s not as bad as being chased down by a sabre tooth tiger or consumed by the last remaining group of cannibals on the planet, the boss being a jerk gives us something to occupy our minds and mouths.
2. Humans are inherently preoccupied with their own survival and leading effectively requires one to sublimate that core drive. Hmmmm. Some good psychobabble here, but it’s worth thinking about. Good campfire fodder when the talk on “are we alone in the universe” runs out.
Possible conclusion: We’re screwed and all of this noble talk is wasting time that could be better spent lamenting our plight and beefing about the boss.
3. Perhaps the predominant management system in use in most of society is horribly flawed in terms of values, motivations, expectations and enabling structures. OK, I’m warming to this more than the “evil” or “predominantly miserable” theories expressed earlier.
Maybe, just maybe, we’ve not licked this management thing yet. Deming did us a great service in crying B.S. on the Deadly Diseases that he viewed in most organizations. And while his 1980’s view to the purity of the models adopted by Japanese companies may be a bit naïve, listen to the Great Doctor describe these 5 and tell me if they’re fixed in your organization yet. At least a cup of coffee that the real answer is no.
Possible conclusion: Fix the flipping management system. It’s time to move beyond the practices of the industrial revolution and build success, effective leadership and enabling systems into our approach. Oh yeah, and that values part is the foundation to build upon!
The Bottom-Line for Now:
I’ll opt for the fact that it’s time to move management forward and build the new systems around the emerging realities. If innovation, creativity, speed, ability to execute and adaptability are all table-stakes attributes of the new winning organization, then it’s time to move management forward and create systems that breed leaders at all levels and for all types of situations. Note to top leaders: ignore the need to breed and build people that will help you navigate this strange, fast and foreign new world at your own peril. It starts with you at the top creating the right foundation. And hint: the foundation is built upon meaningful, actionable values.
Your thoughts?
Beware Contracting “I’m Right, You’re Wrong” Disease?
Filed under: "To Do" List, Leadership, Professional Growth, Surviving Lousy Leaders
It’s time to add another malady to the long list of things that bedevil the many lousy leaders walking unencumbered through our workplaces. It’s called, “I’m Right and You’re Wrong” (IRYW) disease, and while it’s not fatal, it’s clearly annoying to people and debilitating to performance.
Frankly, leaders that suffer from IRYW disease just piss other people off, while stifling creativity and innovation and casually squashing the souls of everyone they encounter.
IRYW sufferers take on many forms, depending upon how far along the disease is in warping their personalities. You might recognize it in one of the following forms:
- The boss that encourages input but never takes it. Ever.
- The boss or co-worker that gets visibly angry when someone disagrees with him/her.
- The manager that habitually throws dissenters under the bus.
- The manager or co-worker that always has to have the last word.
- The leaders that look at you as if you’ve grown two heads when you gather up the courage to share an idea or offer an alternative option.
Unfortunately, we run into this malady in our personal lives as well. We almost all have the relative or friend that is the self-anointed expert and this can be particularly problematic in households when it is a significant other or even an in-law. Feel free to offer up your own coping strategies from these examples…we’ll all learn in the process.
How You Can Avoid Catching “I’m Right, You’re Wrong” Disease:
-Take a daily dose of humility. Remind yourself when you walk in the door that your role is to help others to succeed, not to show everyone how smart you are.
-Set up an early warning system. While granted that it takes a fair amount of emotional intelligence to recognize that this is good, many brilliant and successful leaders cultivate peer relationships where they encourage feedback, including the “quit acting like a jerk” kind. I’ve had two of these colleagues for years, and their occasional clubbing over the head has been remarkably helpful.
-While it’s cliché, hire people smarter than you. Do this right and you’ll not only gain the benefits of their considerable intelligence, but you’ll double your efforts to help them and earn their respect, as you certainly won’t be able to play and get away with IRYW.
-Stay out of environments where you might be tempted to incorrectly assert yourself and damage the group dynamics. Some bosses have no business in group brainstorming sessions. If you’re one, find something else to do.
Surviving a Boss with “I’m Right, You’re Wrong” Disease:
-Recognize that for this individual, it’s really important to feel like they are right. Since were not psychologists here, we’ll have to pass on analyzing childhood issues or assessing other compensating factors and fous on developing some patience.
-A fair number of IRYW sufferers are harmless. They revel in their own seeming brilliance, but their survival instinct allows them to accept ideas and input…especially if they think they prompted the ideas. Again, we’re not psychologists, but you should use some psychology here. Hey, if you are as smart as you think you are, this one should be easy!
-For those that are in the advanced and more dangerous stages of IRYW, this is truly a challenge. I have no qualms attempting to give my boss quality feedback, even if I’m politely telling her that she is an ass, but in these lean job times, many will shy away from that tactic. Either develop moral courage, developing a coping strategy or start looking.
-If this boss provides you latitude to do your work, stay out of his/her way, execute, provide clear, formal updates and if you face a controversial decision, ask for input. Your very professional demeanor may have a neutralizing affect (to some extent) and your asking for input is a reasonable form of managing upwards in this case.
If you as readers have any other advice, we’re all ears!
The Bottom-Line for Now:
Make no bones about it, my emphasis is on working with good people wanting to become great. The failing in all of the writing and talking about effective leadership is that the lousy leaders rarely pay attention and definitely don’t recognize themselves. To those non-readers, enjoy your life For those of you aspiring and growing as professionals, take this as a polite reminder that you don’t need to be right all of the time. If you suddenly finding everyone agreeing with you, you may want to phone a friend and ask for a quick attitude adjustment.
Want a Great Primer in Leadership? Work for a Bastard and Take Notes
Filed under: "To Do" List, Career, Leadership, Performance, Professional Growth, Surviving Lousy Leaders
(And then do the opposite!)
Note from Art: I’m hoping (a bad strategy) that the popularization of the “B” word by director Quentin Tarantino and his forthcoming movie “Inglorious Basterds” (with an e?) has desensitized most of us to that harsh term and label. Apologies if I’ve offended anyone and/or drawn the wrath of your IT spam filter.
Another Note from Art: since several of my former bosses read my posts, please rest assured that none of you are the subjects of or the inspiration for this post! Really!
OK, I am serious about the topic. While I wouldn’t counsel you to seek out and work for a b@st@rd as part of your formal mentoring experience, given the ratio of these characters to good leaders in the workplace, chances are you’ll trip across one or more in your career. When you do, take in the experience as a powerful education in how not to lead.
The Public Executioner!
I still recall the moment earlier in my career when a leader who clearly reveled in leading public executions, used his power and a great command of words to humiliate an individual who had drawn his ire by asking a question about one of his policies. This was at a sales meeting, and the verbal execution continued for two days, sometimes spontaneously generating to fill dead air.
While the boss seemed to gain strength over time, the subject of his attention, a young and in my opinion, a sharp and inquisitive rep, melted into a puddle of human goo. I can’t tell you how many lessons we all drew from that experience. I literally recall vowing to never do that to another human being when it was my day to be in charge.
Most of Us Have Had Close Encounters with Lousy Leaders
I’ve long since concluded that I’m not alone in gaining some great insights on what not to do from lousy leaders. When interviewing for Practical Lessons in Leadership, we were surprised at the number of examples of miserable leaders that served as a kind of opposite inspiration for people.
The result for us in the book was a section devoted to “The Really Bad Habits of Ineffective Leaders,” where we attempted to name and describe the personas of some of these characters.
Perhaps you’ve met them:
- The All Talk, No Action Leader-loves the sound of his/her voice, babble, babble
- The Never-Make-A-Decision Leader-holds everyone hostage out of fear of being wrong.
- The Game-Playing, Fork-Tongued Boss-always screwing with you and will lie to save his hide
- The Public Humiliator-there’s more than one of these characters…they eviscerate the working environment as well as people.
- The I’m Your Best Buddy Manager-until he’s not. It’s just a matter of time.
- The Micro-Manager-not quite evil, but very destructive and debilitating
And my favorite,
- The Assassin. This one is the most dangerous. He/she plots the corporate kills with cold-hearted thoroughness, pulling the trigger and then slipping back into the office culture without being noticed. They are master politicians and manage to often stay above suspicion while plying their trade. Others know and sense it, but often the higher-ups don’t see this side of the person. Beware.
The Bottom-Line:
OK, aside from the cathartic benefits of railing at some bad leaders and bad leader archetypes, there is a point here. You can turn a truly bad and hopefully temporary experience into a positive learning situation.
At some point you won’t work for or next to this person, so pay close attention to the impact that his/her odious behaviors have on individuals, groups, overall morale and of course performance, and then silently vow never to do it that way.
When it’s your day at the head of the line, remember that vow.
-
Chosen by Guy Kawasaki's Alltop.com as a top site in the Leadership category.
Podcast
Available Now!
Practical Lessons
e-book
e-book-Leadership and the Project Manager - Developing the Skills that Fuel High Performance
